This past Friday, we were invited to go to the lady-formerly-known-as-Jaleela's house to browse through her tons of belly dancing goodies. It's official now. Susan is no longer going to be doing any belly dancing.

It really felt odd looking through her things. Kind of like as if someone was looking through MY things. I don't know. It didn't feel right.

It didn't really hit me that much until yesterday when Susan gave me all the troupe stuff like baskets, a few dvds, a pattern, a Compleat Anachronist that she had kept aside just for me, and some flyers for upcoming workshops. And then she looked at me and told me that she was giving these things to me because "Well, I guess that you are the new troupe director now. Especially if Chyanne moves."

Wow! I wasn't really ready for this. I mean, I knew that the moment was coming because Susan had said that she was considering stopping doing belly dancing and then she said that she was selling all her things. And she had not been as involved with the troupe for a little while now. But... still... I wasn't ready.

On a positive note, I just feel blessed that I had the opportunity to at least learn a little from this great teacher and that I had the pleasure of seeing her dance and all the beauty that emanated from her while dancing. I hope to be able to do her justice.

Still... It's such a big loss for dance and for us.

Now... where do I go from here? How do I help promote the troupe? How do I get out name out there? We were known because we were Jaleela's troupe. And she knew about all workshops in the area. Oh boy!

(and, on top of that, I have to get this SCA dancing thing started again! Geez!)

Comments I had received

From Jordana:
You always have a friend in Fort Wayne! I am so sad to hear the Jaleela is done, what a tremendous loss to the Indiana dance community. I hope that she is well! I know what you are going through sista! The good news is that you have a support group! :) I know that you'll do great, and if you need any assistance (even though I'm a bit north) please email me!!! It takes a little while for the initial shock to wear off, but keep your cool, and everything will turn out for the best. Sending love and happy vibes XO Jordana

From me:
Thanks so much Jordana for the kind words. And I will probably take you up on that offer. I am definitely still in shock, I have to admit that.

From Gabi:
I was sad to hear that she is retiring as well. Saturday at the costuming seminar I didn't recognize her husband and simply asked him who he was vending for. It was a shock when he told me that they were Susans items since she was retiring. I agree that it was strange looking through someone's personal dance collection. Different since you are looking at items that were loved, not just there to make the owner $$. I don't know Susan well, but I enjoyed watching her dance and it is very sad to me that she is dropping dance. I do hope she recovers soon and finds her way back. If you need anything Celeste, just let me know.

From Heather:
So sad. I'm so sorry to hear about this. I'm always around here in Indy, and promotion? I work for FedExKinkos.:) Flyers are a good and relatively cheap way to promote groups.

From Suri:
Sister, You are talented and capable of leading us! I think you have many strengths that you don't see. What I think you and Jaleela have in common is not only the love for the dance but the willingness to learn and explore all areas of the dance. Plus, you are a planner and in my book, that never hurts! We will work together and get through this! A few months from now we'll be wondering what we were worried about! Give BRC time (remember Jaleela danced and taught for several year) and we'll be (hopefully) just as well known and respected as Jaleela. I could go on and on but I must get back to reality aka work. Yes, I am also deeply sadend by the unexpected ending of Jaleela's career. She's the only teacher I've known! I wish her well. Take care and see you for brownies and dreads on Friday! Suri

From me:
Guys, you are all so wonderful! Thanks all for the offers to help! It really helps. I'm still in shock. I've been meaning to put that in the original blog post but I have lots of faith in all of us in BRC and I'm sure that we will be all right. It's just that we momentarily lost our direction and the lady who had the vision. And dear sister Suri! Thank you so much for your great comments. That really means a lot to me. If you would have been standing right next to me, you would have received a big ol' hug! And I might do just that on Friday! lol

From Kelly:
its always difficult when someone leaves a troupe. barika has gone through this and there is always a period of mourning, but then we pull together and shimmy on. good luck and best wishes to you in your new endeavor.

From Akilah:
I will miss Jaleela dancing and dancing with us, too. She's the only teacher I've ever had. I have tremendous confidence in and respect for you, so I know all will be well with BRC.

From Beth:
OH man that's it? She's done? I've only seen her a few times. That rocks that you are the new director. I was thinking about doing some classes with her but now i can do them through you!!

From Parvaneh:
I'm seeing this post quite late.... not been a good 'blogger' lately. Yes, it was a sad moment when I read that she was going to retire, and almost surreal to be looking thru the things she'd collected over the years. Still, she did what she had to do, and she made the best choice in choosing you and Chy to head up BRC. We are in very good hands, Celeste!