Well, I've got lots on my mind. So this blog post is going to be long. And I am going to write it in the random order that thoughts pop into my head... but have no fear... the version that will actually be posted will have been reviewed (as I always do) and hopefully will be in a more structured order. lol
Let's start with the meaty stuff. I went to the Rachel Brice workshop in Dayton last Saturday. After learning what was taught on each day, I was really bummed at not having elected to also take the Sunday. Oh well. At least my tribe sister Khalidah took the Sunday workshop and will be able to give us the info.
It was a very interesting workshop, for sure. But like I told my tribe sisters on Monday, I didn't learn that much new stuff. It was mostly yoga and drills. Maybe I would have learned stuff on the Sunday, though. Anyway, as I said (again) this time to my husband, this was a type of workshop that is thoroughly enjoyable to take but is kind of hard to recap for others. It's one workshop of experiences rather than new tricks.
Now, what did I learn? First off that Rachel is human. :o) I really liked that she emphasized that. That was way cool. I was happy to learn that she too struggles with practicing. It makes it easier to forgive myself. I liked her story with, was it Amon Tobin or Tobias? damn! can't remember, who told her that he wanted to work with her because of her practice ethics. She was apparently baffled by this because she thought that she didn't practice enough or whatnot. Anyway, the answer that she got back was that she was thinking about practice constantly. I thought that this was interesting. I think about practice a lot and often. I have images popping in my head and stuff. I just need to put structure around my chaos and actually get down and do stuff. lol Although, I have to say that I feel like my practices are getting better and better. Definitely, The Brice's tips are going to help too. :o)
Another interesting yet puzzling thing was that Rachel considers anything bellydance related as practice somewhat. She doesn't consider it "practice practice" but "practice". And she also said that she might be practicing a move and then thinking about a costume item to make and she would go do it and that's still practice and then she gets back to practice practice. Well, in that case, I do practice a lot 'cause I do a lot of costuming. lol. But the leaving the practice and then doing a costume piece and then practicing again is not something that would work for me. The way that I approach this thing is like with a lot of things and some tips that I got from the Covey classes that I took at work and from yoga classes. In yoga class, the instructor tells us, while we are doing the breaths in the beginning to concentrate on our breath and, if a thought crosses your mind, recognize that it is there and then recenter on your breath. That works very well for me. If I ignore the damn thought, it's going to pop much more than acknowledging it and then mentally pushing it aside. In the Covey classes, the instructor was a very funny lady who was telling us that we should park our cars. That sounded weird. And then she explained that she can see it in our eyes: you're sitting there in class and then, here comes a thought that is looking for a parking spot (like, remember to pick up the dry cleaning) and she sees us making a mental note and all but then, how often do we forget to pick up the damn dry cleaning? So, whenever a thought like that pops into mind, you take your planner and write it down. The "car" is parked and you don't need to think about it anymore. Otherwise, you'll be sitting in another meeting and thinking, "Did I pick up the dry cleaning yesterday or not?" We've all experienced that. So, in the case of, let's say, having a thought on costuming while practicing, I take my journal and write it down and my "car" is parked and I can go back to shaking my thang.
Another interesting thing was that it took Rachel a long time to get some moves. So it's all right if my damn 3/4 shimmy isn't to my liking yet. ;op As hubby would say: practice makes good (he doesn't believe in perfection and neither do I).
A lot of the things, I already knew. It just reinforced them. It reinforced that there is not substitute for practice, repetitions, and good ol' patience.
I looooooooove drills. That's what my former teacher in Quebec would do to help us learn: she would make us drill the moves. I strongly believe that that's why, after I quit dancing for like 4 years, it was easy to do the moves again. They were still not that far off in my body! They were still in muscle memory.
The show after the workshop was great. Lots of talent. At one point, I moved from my seat to go stand next to the back wall to better see the Ruby Hoop girls and Rachel. And there was Rachel, watching the show from a dark room and she was just perfect. It was surreal. And then, when it was her turn to perform, she hopped onto the stage area and did her thank, which was amazing to watch, as can be expected.
Now, here's the thing. I was watching Rachel hop to the stage and that was just like me... well, I mean, that's part of my personality. I'm a dufus, a dork, a geek, still a little girl, hopping around. For me, dancing is like that: hopping fun. If that makes sense... And, before Rachel, I had the pleasure of watching Jordana perform (I always enjoy her performances) and also Avasa (boy, so much attitude! awesome) and the Ruby Hoop girls (who were telling a story and having fun with hoops on fire). And it hit me eventually (don't remember exactly when) that I feel like my personality is not coming through as much as I think it should. It's probably coming out more than I think it is... we are always the worse judge about ourselves. But I feel like maybe I should push myself more.... put myself out there more. It probably makes no sense what I'm saying right now to some folks reading this... but others are bound to know what I'm getting at.
But I know that, again, this takes time and I'm all right with that. I just wonder how one practices that, how one gets to that point, what can I do, etc.? Probably, the best "remedy" is practicing performance attitude while practicing and just plain performance experiences. (note to self: gotta work on that yoga/dance room already! I need a mirror.)
Speaking of which. My first solo is coming up. Woohoo! Chy and I were discussing while traveling to the workshop how hard it is for us to just kick our behinds and do a solo already. We shouldn't have waited for so long. I have performance experience as a troupe. I even have solo experience but that was within the SCA group that I was in in Quebec so it's like dancing for friends... it's not the same as a show. So, my expectations of that first show solo are not that high. I'm not saying that I'm going to botch it or anything. I will definitely do the best that I can. But I don't expect to be the best performer there because, well, I'm still a "baby" performer. No, my goals are simple: it's like a checkmark thing or breaking the ice thing; I will strive to go through it all without (literally) landing flat on my ass; I hope to be at least a little entertaining; and, plain and simple, I will do the best that I can with what I've got. Basically, I'm not setting myself up for failure. ;op
It's weird, though. I am kind of fearless now. About lots of things... including that first solo. That was my New Year's resolution for this year: Be fearless. It's one that seems to stick. Sure, I will get the jitters before performing but it's going to be all right. Oh yeah and I've adapted and adopted the Stuart Smalley affirmation because it's just plain good: I'm good enough. I'm smart engouh. And doggone it, whatever I do, people like me. ;op
That fearlessness seems to come from an acceptance of myself... as a whole. It used to be that I loved pieces of me but not all of me. I seem to more and more embrace the whole me and I love it (or should I say I love me? lol). Sounds weird. Might sound a little vain. So what? I am comfortable in my own skin and that's awesome. That's a recipe for happiness right there. ;o) I know that my hubby, the wise man that he is, has been like that for most of his life. Lucky him! And I know that he has been hinting and helping me get to this point.
That's enough for today!
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