I feel like a mess!
Where to begin?
Well, as the title implies, I basically need to get a grip on things. But it's hard. I feel like I am all over the place yet doing nothing.
I need to tidy things up in the house. Like doing my "slash" room (yoga/dance/meditation/sewing/guest room). But until the big box from the big tv is out, there is not much that I can do. But that can be solved next week. But I don't even know what to do, where to begin, etc. I feel like there is a bunch of other things that I need to do or help doing in the house. And for all of them, I have a vague idea of what needs to be done... Maybe I'm thinking on too big of a scale...
Then there is the whole bellydancing aspect. Again, where to begin? At least we got our talk about the RennFaire last night and it was sooooooooooooo productive. We didn't dance at our practice last night but now I feel like we know what we will be doing at the RennFaire. And, thankfully, because we are "tribally", it makes it so much easier. It was overwhelming to think about the RennFaire and it's not so bad now. So now... I have to do a solo for the Tribal Revolution hafla, we have to come up with something for Mayhem in Muncie, work on the RennFaire piece that I will loosely choreograph, and think about the steps and things to do for my first dabbles at teaching belly dancing.
There is the gym thing that I have to start again. I have gained quite a bit of weight (more than I'd like to admit) and I'm utterly uncomfortable with it. And I can't seem to get a grip on my eating habits... and it seems that the few times that I have the willpower to go to the gym, something happens... like today... my willpower is there... but my allergies are through the roof! I'm considering going back home to remove my contacts because my eyes itch too much! My allergies are way worse since I moved here in the Midwest.
And, lately, it's as if I have a lack of energy... It's probably a by-product of me feeling utterly blah about myself, mainly my body. It had been a while since I had last felt that way so that's very good news. But I hate feeling this way. And I can't seem to shake it off.
Maybe that's what I need: to shake it off, literally...
I haven't been practicing much lately, so maybe a good belly dance practice is going to help. And even if my allergies are bad, I can belly dance to some extent. ;o)
And I need to draw amoebae... which is the technique that Franklin Covey teaches about projects... you put your goal at the center... then you write branches for major steps that you need to take... and the branches can have sub-branches... or if the project is really huge (or the branch is huge in itself), it can be its own amoeba. That usually makes me realize that it's not as convoluted as I thought it was going to be!
Work is uber slow this week so I may do that on work time. Shhhhhhh! Don't tell them!
Comments I had received
From Alhena:
Just be kind to yourself, and take it a little at a time. If you try to take on everything at once, you are only setting yourself up for mishaps. I am all too familiar with the "But, I must do it all and accomplish ALL of these goals at once" mentality, so I believe I know where you are coming from, sister! BTW... I miss dancing with you ladies of the Black Rose!!! *hugz* Gemmy
From Parvaneh:
Celeste, I understand how you feel. I know how stressful it can be to have that much to do. When I have such a list, I just force myself to start somewhere. It doesn't matter for me where I start. Sure, I like to be organized, but I find if I just get something going, one will lead to another and then you've made a good dent in things before you realize. That in itself is motivating and then you can move on to the rest. And as you say, it's not so bad as you thought it would be once you start on it. (and you're secret is safe with me! They'll never know!)
From Akilah:
Be easy on yourself. I find the best way to start in on the massive amounts of stuff I have on my list is to flail around aimlessly for a bit, then just charge in headlong.
From me:
Thanks everybody! For all your great comments and advice! I practiced Tuesday night and already felt better. So, yeah, I needed to literally shake it off. I slowly feel like I am getting a grip on things. Oh and thanks Parvaneh for volunteering to take charge of Sheydaii for the RennFaire. That will be a load off my back and a good opportunity for you! I am really looking forward to dancing to what you create! :o)
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